RA, RA! SIS-BOOM-BAH!

I'm going to be the RA of 10W next year :).
Early Thursday morning I was startled out of my sleeping by a plethora of screaming and giggling girls with a flashlight. I made my way up to the tenth floor where I was dressed like a tea-bag and taught the "horah", a Jewish dance. I was initiated even in so far that I rapped a song they had written for me.

They were (and are) wonderful.
The girls, most of which have never met me, had coffee and pancakes ready upon my arrival. Nearly the entire floor was congregated in the lounge with smiling faces at 5 in the morning. They gave me a really sweet mug from Anthropologie! Bottom line: they're sweet and I'm very excited.



I'm very excited in general, actually.
I've been given so many opportunities this semester and crazy changes are happening in my heart, mind, and circumstances. I am very much learning what it's like to live in the truths of: "the brother of humble circumstances is to glory in his high position; and the rich man is to glory in his humiliation, because like flowering grass he will pass away" (James 1:9-10). I've lived uncomfortably on both sides of many conditions and I treasure the challenges that have grown and stretched me.

And, I'm painting bigger strokes than ever before...
The undeniable joys hidden in my heart are finding their way out as I take bigger leaps of obedience and make bigger messes as well. I've fallen hard, but learned to fly high too. Each day I do my best to live in the place where trust and graditude collide; and I'm finding that to be rather beautiful.

Spring Semester Surprises

Professor McDuffee is, and I quote, "the proprietor of a t-shirt shop in Katmandu" in his mind. He went on to explain that he takes his controversial opinions and loaded thoughts and puts them on a t-shirt inside his head - sometimes "selling" them, (again this is all within the boundary of his brain), to those who could benefit from their advertised truths. "They're not hurting any one's feelings" he shrugged. HAHA! I'm reminded, at least three times a week, how uniquely brilliant the people I get to learn from really are. If we're all a little crazy, this man is my kind of crazy.

My former professor, current employer, and dear respected mentor, Dr. Sauer, has cancer. This might seem like a stark transition from the previous light-hearted surprise; however he is anything but heavy in spirit. This may not have been this 64year-old man's prediction or wish, but he is unshaken and challengingly hopeful. As someone who has taken to calling me "Ann" and greeting me with: "Are you persevering, my child?", I am encouraged even in one of his weakest hours. I prayerfully look forward to the ways this will deepen his dependence and grow our relationship.

I get the opportunity to have a second interview for a 2011-2012 RA position. This has been an unexpectedly exciting process. The application and first interview have already challenged me to look into a metaphorical mirror. Who do people see me as vs who do I want to be? Who am I presently vs. who am I created to be? How do I react to circumstances X, Y, and Z vs. how should I react? What do I like? What makes me angry? Why do I bother? It has provoked some discovery and I'm hopeful of what's to come.

If I Were A Dog, My Tail Would Be Wagging

Yes, I have officially joined the "Blogger" bandwagon; and I must admit there are some pretty cool features. (I know that my background and such is weird... I'll work on that.) Xanga can just be boring and limited after about three years, lol. Anyway, let me tell you about some wicked-awesome things today:

Looking ahead to this fall created a lot of anxiety, confusion, and frustration for me. I spent last spring and summer searching unceasingly for something more / something better. I found a lot of frustration in not knowing what was to come; where would I end up, (literally)? Yet all of that disorientation has led to one of the most exciting times for me. Here I am, in the middle of some really cool stuff...

I have, fairly recently, applied to a handful of schools in hopes of transferring for the second semester. (I'm currently enrolled at the University of Minnesota). And if you're really itching for details about my application process and such, I wrote about it at my previous blogsite here: http://watttigar08.xanga.com/715167225/in-a-nutshell/.

Two days ago I received a letter back from Moody Bible Institute stating my acceptance! Wahoo! Though it took me a little over three hours to open the envelope, it has marked the beginning of an exciting time for me. Over the next few weekends I will be touring different schools, waiting to hear back from others, and praying desperately for direction. Conveniently enough, it starts this weekend with the school in which I know I've got the 'in' if I want it! I leave on Thursday to tour Moody in Chicago, and the most awesome part is that it's going to be only my dad and I. This is a big deal, and I honestly can't wait to just go. That's really how I'm feeling in general lately. I'm fired up, about everything and nothing. I'm craving change and anticipating nothing ordinary.

and I'm hungrier than ever before for God's will to be done in my life...
We just had our Fall Retreat for youth group this past weekend. It was nothing like I expected. Actually I was almost disappointed, definitely frustrated, and left with a lot of questions. On Saturday night in fact, three of us stayed after service for hours just sitting in the empty, cold, and quiet "Tabernacle" to wrestle with God. It's like we were waiting for something, anything! He just didn't show up like I thought He would; like I wanted Him to. So I threw a fit of selfishness. I didn't get my way and someone was going to hear about it.

Yet I now see some things in a new light.
I) The way I felt on Saturday of the retreat, is the way I lived this past summer. And through my waiting, though I kicked and screamed many times, I have been unbelievably blessed.
II) I usually leave retreat thinking that things couldn't get any better. I've left warm, fuzzy, and bright-eyed about the God I spent all weekend crying over. But this retreat, I left hungry. I'm left craving more, expecting more, and anticipating more.
III) I got to really stir some relationships - old and new. After service and during break times, I never felt the urge to bury my face in the carpet until someone came to me. Instead I felt composed and open. I went to people, instead of them always coming to me; and I said things that were out of my comfort zone (but in obedience) because I felt courageous and confident instead of merely broken.

In conclusion, a lot of cool things are happening in my heart, mind, and life. I feel like I'm running in place, really quickly. And if I were a dog, with a tail, it would definitely be wagging!