I'm getting married. I'm getting married. I'm getting married.
That impending reality sinks slowly as I sigh through my smile. I've never been the smitten-type, but my world was lifted from the ground on March 23rd and it is still descending.
If you know my story, and our story, you might be shaking your head in slight amusement. You might find yourself wanting to question "Didn't you see this coming?" or exclaim, with a smirk, that you "called it years ago". But for me, the moment Jared's knee went down, the flood gates opened.
It's not that I didn't expect it to ever come and it's not that I hadn't already made up my mind that I was going to spend the rest of my life with this wonderful man. In fact if it weren't for the two hands that somehow made their way up to cover my mouth, and the fact that the only thing I seemed to be able to move were the joyful tears from my eyes, I might've shrieked "YES" before he even finished a sentence.
I wasn't expecting the tornado of chaos and peace that began to twirl. In a fierce attempt to guard my heart I had never long-entertained the idea that this could be my reality. I didn't anticipate the freedom and assurance that immediately took root. And those things arrived to stay, at least for now.
I have a friend here at Moody whose summer is filled with friends weddings and many of her friends are "brides" in her mind and world. Recently we were chatting about what that meant for her and her response took me by surprise: "I am encouraged by you", she said, "You're such a peaceful bride". Another friend from home suggested they hadn't ever known me to be this restful.
Quickly I am realizing this journey is more than just a climax in a fairytale with my highschool sweetheart. I'm found in a season of endings and beginnings. I'm in steadfast battle and in constant process with all that is building. My world is turning, and I'm happily along for the ride.
That impending reality sinks slowly as I sigh through my smile. I've never been the smitten-type, but my world was lifted from the ground on March 23rd and it is still descending.
If you know my story, and our story, you might be shaking your head in slight amusement. You might find yourself wanting to question "Didn't you see this coming?" or exclaim, with a smirk, that you "called it years ago". But for me, the moment Jared's knee went down, the flood gates opened.
It's not that I didn't expect it to ever come and it's not that I hadn't already made up my mind that I was going to spend the rest of my life with this wonderful man. In fact if it weren't for the two hands that somehow made their way up to cover my mouth, and the fact that the only thing I seemed to be able to move were the joyful tears from my eyes, I might've shrieked "YES" before he even finished a sentence.
I wasn't expecting the tornado of chaos and peace that began to twirl. In a fierce attempt to guard my heart I had never long-entertained the idea that this could be my reality. I didn't anticipate the freedom and assurance that immediately took root. And those things arrived to stay, at least for now.
I have a friend here at Moody whose summer is filled with friends weddings and many of her friends are "brides" in her mind and world. Recently we were chatting about what that meant for her and her response took me by surprise: "I am encouraged by you", she said, "You're such a peaceful bride". Another friend from home suggested they hadn't ever known me to be this restful.
Quickly I am realizing this journey is more than just a climax in a fairytale with my highschool sweetheart. I'm found in a season of endings and beginnings. I'm in steadfast battle and in constant process with all that is building. My world is turning, and I'm happily along for the ride.
