(dis)comfort, (dis)placement

This semester I took a class titled "Race, Poverty, and Social Justice". It's been an extremely good experience. Through books, discussions, and interactions I have come nose to nose with challenging thoughts and beliefs of mine and others - both consciously and unconsciously. I could've communicated before this class that race and class issues existed, but never have I come into contact with the depth and extent of the perpetual levels of mess involved.

Throughout the class we were assigned to make "excursions" to different parts of Chicago, displacing ourselves into another culture. We spent time, in groups, in Chinatown, Little Village (majority Mexican), the South side (majority African American), and near Devon (majority Middle-Eastern). The pictures in this blog are from those trips.

Yet even beyond the trips, I was challenged to analyze my every cross-cultural interaction. It was fascinating to seemingly unlock pieces of my heart as I sought awareness. As time has gone on, even within the semester, I have become eager to cross boundaries of class and race. I've pursued the uncomfortable as the value in risk has unfolded. It's as if I caught this unshakable bug that won't rest without people knowing they have worth; especially people whom the rest of the world has written off. I crave to touch the "untouchable".

And honestly I don't really know how to go about it all yet. I don't know the right or best way of appropriately loving strangers (more or less), but I'm chasing answers. I'm carefully prayerful about it as I'm convinced it's God's heart to see and love people right where they're at. I'm learning to be still in the midst of new contexts and exchanges, knowing discernment takes time. And finally I've concluded that as long as I'm at school in the city, I won't be satisfied unless I'm smothering it on me - and me on it!

FFFFFF

FOOD
I've always enjoyed food; especially with good company. But this semester I've developed a particular interest in actually gaining an awareness of WHAT is in the food I'm eating. (Though, I've quickly learned that sometimes it's just best not to think about it). Anyway, this has led me - in a round about way - to want to learn to cook and bake more and better. (That was a ridiculous sentence grammatically, but I hope you can get past it and stay with me).

FRIEND
I'd like to introduce you to my friend Katie... she too wishes she had a million dollar gift card to Whole Foods; and she is just an all-around fantastic woman.

FUN
We decided that it would be fun to learn about food together and share some cooking/baking experiences. Being the creative women that we are, we of course opted to start our own "cooking show". Now I'm not sure you can call it a show because it hasn't yet been filmed and it's timing of events is very sporadic; BUT our dream is to eventually pay for our future children's college tuition(s) with it's profit ;)!

FLAMMABLE
We have named our show Flammable (for which you will see why shortly) and given it the tag-line of "No Recipes Allowed!" (because we've agreed to never use a recipe, besides those stored within our mind). (I really need to stop using parentheses). You don't need to know all of the rules to appreciate the concept.

FAIL
Our first attempt was home/dorm-made granola. It was developing just fine until we doused it in honey, turned the oven to 385 degrees, and then went to our room to talk about boys... I mean work on homework ... - forgetting to set a timer. Needless to say, those are not chocolate chips or chocolate residue on the pan. That's charcoaled, torched, carcinogen-flavored granola. Hahahahah!


FINALLY
We just couldn't settle for failure, so we adjusted some of our ingredients and tried a second time. After air-ing out the kitchen and cleaning the pan, of course, we claimed success; having made a delicious midnight snack, sharing a stomach-wrenching laugh, and agreeing to double the recipe next time.



...more adventures to come

DTR

So at Moody, we have an acronym for pretty much everything. "DTR" stands for "define-the-relationship". It can be used in various contexts to reference a number of things. For example, when a guy has taken the initiative to look up your phone number in the school directory, and texted you multiple times a day since, and you're just not that interested... you perhaps meet him for lunch in the SDR (student-dining-room) for a DTR. Or, if a girl has been subtly dropping hints that she digs you, and you'd be overjoyed to have her as your girlfriend... it might be time to take her to coffee and DTR. Now that you have a clearer understanding of my chosen title, I'll move on.

Today at our school we had what's called a "Day One", which is more or less a tour day for prospective or incoming students. What was particularly unique about this specific tour day for me was that one year ago today, I was on the opposite side of the process; a prospective taking part in a "Day One". And though it seems like it's been much longer than a year, I still remember it pretty vividly.

After a year together, it only seems appropriate that I DTR ;) - and I thought I'd invite you in on this!

Dear MBI,
I would have to say that we've shared quite the year together and things are going pretty well. I commend you on being so very gentlemenly (you should know by now that I like to make up words) in paying for the majority of our time together. I also just want to thank you for accepting me, short-comings and all! I must admit that you've played a big role in shaping me this past year. You continually challenge me to be everything that I was created to be. You have challenged, grown, and stretched me in ways I couldn't have imagined. You've introduced me to some of your amazing friends (By The Hand ministry, Soul City Church, etc) and drawn me out into crazy places throughout Chicago!
I will confess that your requiring of me to sacrifice proximity to family, Jared, and friends has inevitably stirred doubts in me - I just wasn't sure we could work out. But I must say that I've found contentment in the balance and you've been quite the pleasant surprise!
Don't get too excited here, because I am in no way contemplating an actual relationship with you. (I've got a great guy already). I'm simply suggesting that we continue to be friends; granted it will most likely be long-distance after the Spring of 2012. Anyway, I guess I just wanted to say that you've been good and unlike anything I've met before. I consider myself blessed to have had this past year. I think we've got a good thing going! I hope you feel the same.

Sincerely,
Ash

My Future Child

"...HE is a MIGHTY SAVIOR. HE will take delight in you with gladness. With HIS love HE will calm ALL your fears. HE will rejoice over you with joyful songs" -Zephaniah 3:17

You know, I think I'm going to name one of my children Zephaniah. (Standing against the fear that peers may call him "Phanny", lol). Seriously though... I want to always be reminded of the truths of this verse. AND that my child would literally wear it across their chest, warms me already.

Picture it with me now;
"HELLO my name is: The Lord's Delight, Comforted One, Rejoiced Upon. But you can call me Zephaniah.

In the midst of battling shames of any kind - HE WILL DELIGHT IN (ME) WITH GLADNESS.
In the midst of fighting lies from every direction - HE WILL CALM ALL (MY) FEARS.
In the midst of my every short-coming - HE WILL REJOICE OVER (ME).

And yes, that's really all I have to say for today.

Leaves are Falling, Seasons are Flying

This past weekend we played in the Regional volleyball tournament in Michigan. We took third place, which means I won't be soaking sun in Florida for Nationals...lol. But it was a great wrap up to a particularly great season.

We finished with a record of something like 22-6, and claimed a number of those W's from talented teams that deemed us underdogs. We were a team of eleven girls whose tallest player was characteristic of the shortest on some teams. We started the year with a new coach and team, curiously filled with expectations. As a family we were pushed physically, emotionally, mentally, and spiritually. Never have I experienced such a rapid, but genuine, knitting together of lives.

These people quickly became so valuable to me. As cliche as it sounds, we shared blood, sweat, and tears. We moaned together while stretching after lunges, rubbed our eyes as we loaded the bus for tournaments, and shared everything from shampoo to clothes to deodorant. We pushed and challenged each other. We compared bruises and blisters, and bottles of pain killer.

We learned how to juggle sports, school, work, and life; and perhaps more importantly how to admit that sometimes we just can't do it all. This season, volleyball was more than a sport for me. I've never experienced such community with athletics. We shared life not because we had to, but because we wanted to. I was free to encourage and be encouraged. It became a season of refining strengths instead of learning weaknesses. Beyond developing physical skill, it included character development. We failed, fought, and succeeded together. We laughed, cried, prayed, sang, and danced as a team.

I'll most remember eating at Red Robin; playing a game where we all hold hands under the table and flip a coin to see who can grab a ketchup bottle the quickest. I won't forget eating at Culver's discussing whether you "chuck" or "chunk" a ball. I hope I always remember the Grace Bible Tournament where a coach scouted our team, taking vigorous notes for two whole games on me, and other non-starters; only to find out he'd wasted an hour (and a lot of ink) because the girls his team would face were on our bench that day, hahaha! I'll remember when Rachel lost her toenail, and Katie lost her 'finger-tube'. I won't forget warming up each game with Megan Curtiss. I'll most remember when Hannah came back to the bench and missed her chair completely, lol. And I can't forget movie night when coach came flying on his stomach, on a rolling desk chair, and kicked a cup of apple cider out of my hand! Honestly, I could go on and on because this has really been a scrapbook worthy season, and I'm sure it will build it's own camp on my memory lane.

As it's all said and done, I'm so thankful to have been a part of it. Through nearly sleepless nights and road trips marked by carsickness, I take away from the experience much more than I could count as lost. I'm reminded of how lucky I am to be surrounded with people to love and be loved by. Here's to a season marked by surprises galore!


Moody Volleyball 2010: "We provide the effort, God provides the results".